Why Overthinking Can Feel Productive
When you’re feeling uncertain, turning over a problem in your head repeatedly, or overthinking, can feel productive. If you experience anxiety, overthinking can become a habit that feels like it’s useful at preventing mistakes, preparing for every outcome, or achieving complete certainty.
Yet paradoxically, overthinking can work to actually create more anxiety, leaving you further stuck in your head.
What Is the Difference Between Overthinking & Problem Solving?
You may find it difficult to distinguish between overthinking and problem solving, but there are differences you can spot. Problem solving tends to be specific, actionable, and capable of reaching a stopping point. For example, problem solving might involve deciding whether to cancel an event due to weather. You might gather information, make a decision based on the information available, and put that decision into action.
Overthinking, on the other hand, tends to be repetitive in nature, hypothetical, and focused on achieving a level of certainty that may not be possible. So if you had the same situation of deciding whether to cancel an event, you might engage in overthinking by trying to think through every possible scenario (including unlikely ones), worry about how each individual involved will react, and procrastinate on making a decision until you feel certain enough about your choice.
Signs You May Be Stuck in an Overthinking Loop
Here are a few signs you may be stuck in a cycle of overthinking:
- Replaying conversations in your head
- Repeatedly weighing the same options over and over again
- Seeking reassurance from others
- Imagining every possible outcome
- Asking endless “what if” questions
- Feeling less certain the longer you think
Why Anxiety Makes It Hard to Stop Overthinking
Overthinking has ties to anxiety because of its relationship to uncertainty. Anxiety is often fueled by an intolerance of living with uncertainty, and a search for control to manage that intolerance.
Overthinking is one of the many strategies your mind reaches for when it doesn’t want to feel uncertainty. You continue to mull an issue over and over in your head because of the belief that maybe one more round of analysis will lead to a feeling of certainty.
When Overthinking Turns Into Reassurance-Seeking
Overthinking doesn’t always just affect how your mind handles things; it can impact your behavior and relationships as well. In your search for certainty, you may repeatedly ask friends, family, and coworkers for opinions to find some reassurance around the decision you are trying to make.
Reassurance-seeking can also involve repeatedly checking online for more information, or mentally reviewing evidence you’ve gathered in an attempt to reassure yourself.
These types of behaviors may offer temporary relief, yet they ultimately reinforce the idea that certainty is required and this can keep you stuck in a cycle of anxiety, overthinking, and reassurance-seeking.
How Overthinking Can Affect Decisions, Relationships & Daily Life
Over time, overthinking can be costly to your time, relationships, and quality of life. Here are some of the ways overthinking can disrupt your life:
- Getting stuck in decision paralysis, which keeps you from moving forward
- Lost time spent thinking rather than doing things that matter to you
- Disrupted sleep
- Difficulty being present in your life due to being more in your thoughts than experiencing the present moment
- Relationship strain as your relationships become dominated by reassurance-seeking
How to Tell When You Have Thought About Something Enough
If you’re stuck in overthinking, you may find it hard to know when you’ve thought about something enough. When is it ok to make a decision and move on?
Start by identifying a reasonable stopping point for yourself. For example, you can tell yourself that you have a certain amount of days to decide whether you are going to make a major life decision.
Explore within yourself if there is truly new information to consider, or whether you might be over-researching a situation and grasping for additional information that may not be useful to making your decision.
Notice if there is a repetitive nature to your thinking patterns. If you’re turning over the same pros and cons repeatedly, you may be stuck in overthinking and would be better served by making a decision.
Finally, decide if there is an action you can take towards making a decision. Sometimes getting out of overthinking involves just making a decision and seeing what it’s like to live out that decision, rather than endlessly trying to imagine in your head which decision is better.
What Acceptance Has to Do With Overthinking
We’ve explored how overthinking has to do with intolerance of uncertainty. The path out of this intolerance is building acceptance towards uncertainty. Acceptance simply means making room for the feelings of uncertainty that come with making a decision and committing to living it out.
Many decisions in life come with uncertainty. For example, if you have a job offer, you don’t have a crystal ball to know if this new job will be better than your last one. Working on acceptance involves acknowledging that you can’t know the future, but life may offer more meaning and fulfillment for you if you feel free to make a decision and explore what comes out of that decision.
Taking Action Before You Feel 100% Certain
If you remain stuck in overthinking, you’re essentially putting your life on pause. This can have costs, as you miss out on the chance to try new things, build new relationships, and explore new paths.
Confidence does not come from waiting around for your mind to create the perfect answer for you. Confidence actually comes from giving things a try and being willing to feel the uncertainty that comes with living out actions in line with your values.
How Therapy Can Help With Chronic Overthinking
Chronic overthinking can be a challenging habit to break. Therapy can help you identify patterns that are maintaining your anxiety and learn to respond differently to intrusive or repetitive thoughts. In therapy, you’ll explore ways to reduce reassurance-seeking, and you’ll be gently encouraged to make decisions that help you build greater flexibility and self-trust.
I’m a licensed professional counselor specializing in acceptance-based therapy for overthinking and anxiety. I offer virtual sessions for people throughout Texas, and in-person sessions in my Houston office. If you’re interested in working with me, schedule a free consultation call at the link below.