A phrase that has been growing in popularity in recent years is “religious deconstruction”. But what does that word mean, and what does it have to do with therapy?
What is religious deconstruction?
Religious deconstruction, also known as faith deconstruction, is a term used to describe the process of examining religious beliefs that you once held to be true to see if they still fit for you. The word is often discussed in terms of examining Evangelical Christianity, though it has applications to many religious and spiritual experiences. Personally, I was raised Catholic and have found the term to be helpful to describe my own process of examining the beliefs I was raised with.
Many people come to the process of deconstruction because there are aspects of their faith that no longer make sense or fit with their values. For example, maybe you were raised in a faith that preached queerness as a sin, and you’re starting to see the harmfulness of that message. Or perhaps you were raised with sermons that had vivid depictions of eternal damnation, and you’re starting to see that this created a lot of unnecessary anxiety within you. Some people have discovered deconstruction when they see their religious leaders unable to embrace anti-racism and the value of diversity. Many people recognize that overall their religious experiences have left them feeling chronic shame and self-criticism that does not fit with how they’d like to treat themselves.
So what is religious deconstruction therapy?
Many people navigate the religious deconstruction process without seeking counseling or therapy, and if you are able to navigate this process successfully without therapy – that’s great! However, for many people, this deconstruction process can be highly stressful and anxiety provoking. You may find yourself feeling overwhelming feelings of sadness, anger, and grief. The guidance of a therapist can help you navigate this stressful process and help you connect with what your true values are underneath all of that anxiety and stress.
Deconstruction can be a lonely and isolating process, and working with a therapist can help bridge the gap between leaving your old community and finding a new one. Your counselor can help you identify which relationships from your religious community are worth fighting for and establishing new dynamics and boundaries, and which relationships you might need space from as you navigate this process.
Some people experience traumatic symptoms during and after the deconstruction process. For example, hypervigilance, rigid perfectionism, chronic shame, and frequent self-criticism can all be signs of religious trauma. These are all experiences that a therapist well-versed in religious trauma can guide you through.
How does this type of therapy promote healing?
Religious deconstruction might sound pretty intense after these descriptions of the trauma, anxiety, and stress that can come out of the process. However, many people find that on the other side of religious deconstruction is a wonderful world of autonomy, values-alignment, and freedom. You may still struggle from the effects of your past religious harm from time to time, but you’ll also likely find a greater connection with yourself and your own desires for life.
You’ll also feel more connected with the wider world. Many rigid religions practice isolating from the rest of the world – but after leaving this restrictive environment you have the freedom to develop diverse relationships, passions, and interests.
Often people find themselves deconstructing because they were given a very narrow option of how to practice spirituality, morality, and ethics. You deserve more freedom to explore what makes sense to you – and life after religious deconstruction gives you that opportunity. There’s painful grief in realizing that you missed out on this chance in the past, but also freedom in noticing that you have the rest of your life to explore what brings you joy, pleasure, purpose, and fulfillment.
Getting started with religious deconstruction therapy
I’m a religious deconstruction therapist, and I see clients online throughout Texas, and in-person in my Houston office. I’d love to explore if we’re a good fit to work together. You can schedule a free introductory call here. And if you’re outside of Texas, I recommend checking out the directory of religious trauma therapists at the Reclamation Collective.
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